My ‘Trans-Fur-Mation’

'You can only dance around destiny for so long before fate pulls you in.'
-Author Unknown

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It truly amazes me the ways in which fate and destiny enter our lives at the most opportune, yet unexpected, times. It is as if we are all destined for something greater, and everything that leads up to that point (whether positive or negative) acts as the compass towing us toward that end. Though I’ve never really been the spiritual type, reflecting back on everything that had happened and everything that I have learned over the past year, I am a firm believer that destiny had finally called my name.

For me, 2018 had been an unpredictable roller coaster of events and emotions. Looking back, however, no single event had a more profound impact on my life than my discovery of the furry fandom. My ‘trans-fur-mation’ (so to speak) could not have happened more perfectly, and the timing and sequence in which everything fell into place makes me truly believe it was meant to happen.

My introduction to the fandom started innocently enough at the Pawstar vendor booth at Anime Boston. My ex (dating at the time) and her friends were attempting to get me more into anime, but the furry-related clothes on display oddly drew my attention. I had found myself returning to that booth several times, and by the end of the convention, I had just about three-quarters of a full fursuit! By the time I returned to NY, I realised that the only thing I was missing was a head. Low and behold, it just so happened that my ex’s sister makes fursuit heads as a side hobby. I had never really had the chance to explore my interests in the fandom before, but by that point I accepted that becoming a furry was going to be a thing.

Her knowledge base and expertise with making my head had turned the entire project from a new cosplay idea to a complete fursona, and before I knew it, Sabre was born! Throughout the process, I became fully immersed in learning as much as I could about the furry community, and I quickly stumbled upon AnthroCon. What better way to experience the furry fandom first-hand than attending one of the largest furry conventions in the United States? Looking back, it amazes me how naive I was in thinking AnthroCon was just a way to ‘test the water.’

My new hobby began to spill into my professional life, as my work’s rather expressive dress code allowed me to wear my ears and tail on shift. One day, as if planned, I was arranging merchandise in the back when my manager approached me about customers rocking ears and tails as well! They were quick to introduce me to the local furry group: Upstate New York Fur Community. I couldn’t wait to talk to my new furry friends after work, and I learned to my amazement that some members were heading to AnthroCon as well! I couldn’t believe my luck!

Without going into too much detal to save for another blog post, AnthroCon far exceeded any of my expectations! With my newfound friends from the group (which was the first time I was able to meet them in person), I got to experience the best of what the fandom had to offer. Throughout the convention, I again could not believe my luck, as I was able to meet with not only the friendliest people in existance, but also several of the most popular furs in the fandom, including my furry YouTube idol Ace of Hearts Fox! (Sadly I have no picture with him because I was too starstruck to ask, but a goal of AnthroCon 2019 for sure!) It was such an incredible feeling to know that through this fandom I was able to find true friendship, especially after years of putting trust and faith in people only to have them take advantage of me or stab me in the back. Little did I know that I would truly need it, as things started to fall off the tracks directly after.

The next few months for me was a perfect storm of negativity, as if I was hit by an emotional train. The realisation of my break-up with my ex, combined with her and 'friends' screwing me over for a trip, combined with work becoming increasingly stressful, combined with loosing my vehicle (of which I rely heavily on) in an unfortunate deer-related accident, things had become particularly difficult for me. But one night, I received a messge from one of my friends from the group, who asked when I was working so he could visit me. I was surprised, because by geography he was over an hour away drive from where I worked. When I reminded him of this fact, his reply was simply, 'So...When do you start?' On point, he and several others came to the mall the next day and surprised me at work. When they left, I couldn't control myself, and I broke down in the back room. I had never experienced that in my life, friends willing to literally spend over an hour of their time (each there and back) just to visit me was truly heartwarming. It was the first time I felt like I actually belonged, and to this day I dont know if they realised how much that simple act truly meant to me.

Things began to look up again, and as if finding this amazing group of people wasn't enough, fate decided to bless me one more time. What happened next was something I never expected, but something truly amazing nonetheless. As the summer drew to a close, we decided to have a furmeet at the Great Escape/Six Flags. With work hitting the boiling point for me, I was looking forward to the meet for some time. We couldn't wear our heads due to park policy, but at the very least we could wear our tails, which was good enough for me. I was focussed mainly on enjoying the day with friends stress-free, until out of the blue one of the ride operators after seeing our tails outed himself as a furry as well! I thought nothing of it at the time, and the group added a new member that day, but that quickly turned into something magical. Looking back, it is hard to believe that that innocent enough event would lead me to falling in love with my amazing boyfriend Ki Hayai! I had a feeling that I would find my soul-mate within the community, but I did not believe it would be this soon! We've been dating for now almost four months, and every day I am with him I realise I'm blessed to have him in my life!

As this crazy year draws to an end, the more I reflect, the more I realise I was destined to find this fandom. As I enter 2019, for the first time I can enter with people I can truly call my friends, and a love that inspires me to be a better version of myself each day. I truly believe my experiences throughout 2018 served as a reminder of how fate works in our lives. No matter what happens, whether good or bad, everything happens for a reason. We may not think about it at the time, but there is something greater in store that these events help us to discover. What is meant to be will always find a way, and I do truly believe I found my way here!

 ___

An Aside: Evidence of Fate In Action

I was at a friend's place one day, well before AnthroCon or meeting the Upstate NY Fur Community. I was talking about my interests in the furry fandom, when my friend brought up that her boyfriend ran into several furries at his construction job the other day. They were given hard hats and vests, and they took this photo [5]. I was so excited to know that there were furres local to me! After AnthroCon and my furry shock, I was determined to find out who they were so I could join in. Looking closer at the photo, I knew exactly who they were: none other than the friends that attended AnthroCon with us!

[1] All decked out in Pawstar pieces for the last day of Anime Boston, April 2018!
[2] Sabre Wulf is almost done!
[3] Sabre is ready for AnthroCon's Rave (Last Night of AnthroCon, July 2018)!
[4] My boyfriend Ki and I spot the talented Jib Kodi at Furpocalypse, October 2018!
[5] I will meet these floofs at AnthroCon, just a few months away! Coincidence, or evidence of fate?